Meditation on "Hurt Feelings"

Love does no wrong to a neighbor. Love, therefore, is the fulfillment of the law.
(Romans 13:10)

I have desired to write on the topic of "hurt feelings" for a while now, but wanted to meditate more deeply to achieve greater clarity.

I encounter people daily who tell me their feelings have been hurt by somebody or some thing or event. Hurt feelings happen when people do something that is not in line with other people's expectations. For example, you go into a store to purchase an expensive item and you get treated like a door mat. You say to yourself, "What did I do to that person to deserve such treatment; all I came here to do is buy something. I meant no harm to the other person."

The question I have been asking the Lord is: "If You are the Architect of Everything in the universe, as I believe you are, why would you allow somebody to hurt somebody else? What is the purpose of hurt feelings, Lord?"

I received the answer to these questions from the Spirit recently, and would like to share them with readers today. It is my hope that the answers will provide some light - especially to those who frequently have their feelings hurt.

The answers to the two questions are fundamentally linked to the Cross. On the death side of the Cross - where there is uncrucified flesh - there is "me" and "I." The lack of crucifixion implies that "I" can get hurt. When somebody does something to upset another person, the flesh or soul complains because it is not getting what it expects to receive. Our souls contain our emotions, and hurt feelings elicit an emotion or several emotions. People that have their feelings hurt over some event become upset, angry, dejected. They scream, yell, stomp up and down, weep or cry. In many cases, people that have their feelings hurt are wrapped up in self pity. Self pity is a sure sign of uncrucified flesh - people feeling sorry for themselves.

The Lord has a sure fire solution for self pity and hurt feelings. The solution is the Cross.

On the other side of the Cross - where there is only Love, Light and Life - there is no "I" or "me." There is only crucified flesh. There is no self or ego. "I" cannot get hurt, because I am no longer living. I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me (Galatians 2:20).

Put simply, there is no self pity in Christ. There is only Love, Light and Life. It is not about you and it is not about me. It is all about faith, trust, hope and love. He must increase, but we must decrease (John 3:30).

If you read the Scriptures, you will see the Spirit pouring through Jesus instructing disciples to not resist an evildoer. Do not resist an evildoer! The Lord says turn the other cheek when struck on one side of the face. When they take your shirt, offer them your coat as well (Matthew 5:39-40). The Spirit also says powerfully through the Lord:

"Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you so that you may be sons of your Father in heaven." (Matthew 5:43)

Love your enemies! Pray for them. When somebody punches you in the face, turn the other check and allow them to strike again. These are things that uncrucified flesh finds difficult to do - very, VERY difficult. On the other hand, crucified flesh can do all things through God, including these things.

So you see, on the Life side of the Cross, where the flesh has been crucified and the Spirit is the supreme guiding force of one's heart, there are no hurt feelings. You cannot hurt Christ's feelings. It sounds silly even writing that line. The Spirit loves and only loves. He loves God, He loves His neighbors and He loves His enemies.

If somebody hurts you, forgive them and pray that they fall on the stone and become utterly broken. I repeat: forgive them and pray for them. As we have noted in several of our blog posts over the past couple of weeks, it is through the process of falling on the stone and becoming broken that one finds the Cross. It is through the Cross that we enter into Christ - into God's true expression of love.

As the Spirit said through Paul to the Romans:

"Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord. Therefore

"If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
If he is thirsty, give him a drink;
For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head."

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."
(Romans 12:17-21)

Loving your enemies and praying for those who persecute you is equivalent to heaping coals of fire on their heads! Love is the equivalent of acid to Satan - it burns him up! There is nothing - NOTHING - that God's love cannot overcome or defeat. God's love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:8). That is why the Spirit said through Paul:

"Love is the fulfillment of the law" (Romans 13:10).

When the flesh is crucified on the Cross, we become dead to the law and alive to all things in and of Christ. Our feelings cannot get hurt. If evil is done to us, the Lord will deal with it. Vengeance is His - not ours!

May you never again have your feelings hurt and may you know the power of His resurrection and God's never failing love.

Agape,

Steve